हम दिल भले, दिल खुले लोगों में आया करते हैं!
यही कह- कहकर वो दिल जलाया करते हैं!!

यह झूटी सादगी जो फोरन दिखाया करते हैं!
यह ख़ुद को ख़ुद ही हम में आजमाया करते हैं!!

दिल लगी दोस्ती का जो नक़ली परचम फेलाया करते हैं!
यकीनन बेखबर हैं, ज़मीर ख़ुद उनके चीख़- चीख कर हमको बताया करते हैं!!

दिल है काला, लिबास काला,काले ही ख़याल बसाया करते हैं!
न मानो, परख लो, हम हवा में तीर थोड़ी लगाया करते हैं!!

मुत्मइन हैं बेशक ज़ेहन और दिल से इनके!
यही कुछ राज़ हैं, जो हम उनसे छुपाया करते हैं!!

ऐ मेरे चाहने वालों ज़रा सुन लो, ज़रा लिख लो
मेरी मां सा चाहो तो मंजूर- ए- दरख्वास्त होती हे!!

हवस बरफ्तगी(Madness) हे, मुख्तसर हे, जुनून- ए- शामिल है।
मोहव्वत हे ही तो फ़िर aक्यों जिस्मों की बात होती हे।।

चाहत ही तो पा – व- गिल (considerate) हे, बेलौस(selflessness)- ए- अफज़ल हे।
ना मानों पूंछ लो मां से दलीलें साथ होती हैं।।

देखी हे दिल्लगी मां की हर शक्श ने बेशक।
पाओगे दर्मयां उसको, जब भी तबियत नासाज़ होती हे।।

जिदंगी पेचीदा हे, ग़ैर मुन्नज़ीम(unorganised)हे, दकीक (inexplicit) भी हे।
खुशनुमा हो जाता हे सफ़र जब मां की जज़ाएं ( दुआएं) साथ होती हैं।।

दरयाफ़्त इस तरह कीजिए ख़ुदा की अज़मत को।
मां को भेजा हे उसने तुम्हारी ख़िदमत को।।

दास्तां वो सुनाए तुमको तुम्हारे बचपन कि।
जीती जागती सूरत हे मुकम्मल जन्नत की।।

वो हसीना – ए- रुखसार हे, मरियम- उज्जबानी हे।
में आगोश में हूं उसके बस ख़ुदा की मेहरबानी हे।।

_सोफिया मालिक

PUFFED UP:  Have high spirits, don’t lose hope and don’t take any entrance exam lightly if you wish to be in the top merit list. Buy all the requisite material. Be it your books or the notes, you should have them all, handy, while you are preparing for your entrances. Avoid disturbance and distractions; always remember everything can come later, be it enjoyments or parties but your entrances won’t and if you can’t make it this time so you have to drop a year which is a complete trauma for a number of students.

THOROW WITH PREVIOUS YEAR PAPERS: It’s better to take the exam feel before sitting in the real exam hall. Previous year papers indeed works as a fuel in your fire of cracking your entrances. Thus, if you want to see yourself in the top list, you shouldn’t in any case miss out on them. Doing minimum of ten papers can give you and edge over other candidates. They prepare you better then long course books. They are highly recommended when you are left with few days in your hands, they help you to prepare well and hit the top.

REFFER COACHING INSTITUTES: Decision of coaching is always relative it differs from person to person, few students ace it even without  taking coaching, however few prefer to have a systematic schedule,  refined study material and tutors to catch up the crucial contents for exams. Coaching can bring laurels to your rank and always works like an added cream to your cake. If you wish to get selected and finding it difficult to arrange all the required study material, also finding it difficult to maintain a consistent  schedule at your end ,coaching adds value, however everything can be referred for guidance at the end its your perseverance and will power which shouldn’t be given a loose hand.

 BE VIGILENT: Give everything a vigilant feat, before sitting in the exam hall, decide how much time you have to spend in each section, if the paper is divided in to sections find your forte and attempt that well first, also, divide time among the number of questions. Read the instructions very carefully, check if there is negative marking, and attempt questions consciously. Read them thoroughly. Tick mark if you are sure, mark differently, if you want to refer them later. Keep the track of time. Don’t waste too much time on a single question. Be prudent.

 FOLLOW A CONSISTANT SCHEDULE: Consistency is a key to success, we become what we consistently practice, thus maintain a consistency of your academics, be calculative and serious about your ‘ to do list’, make sure you hit the most of it at the end of the day. In nutshell, I should tell you we don’t get what we wish for, we get what we work for.

Hey dear secret human, how will you feel if you get to know, there was someone who admired you to the eternity. That someone never made an attempt to let you know. Because what she felt is, like many confessions in a friendship this confession will also spoil everything that can go beautiful, also that someone who was happier to make the stunning romantic scenarios in her head, than actually feeling their tangible aspects.

Don’t you wonder? How it all happened? How come she started admiring you, loving you very secretly and never let anyone know?

To start with, dear secret loved one, I fell for your eyes, that one day, while tripping we were assigned a task in the group and you and I were the only people volunteered to complete it. That’s when I saw you closely enough while discussing Ideas and jotting them down.

 Fortunately you were in the same bus in which I was, I saw your reflection on my window ,perennially ,because you were sitting on an angle from where your reflection was apparent on my glass window .Every time, when we got down my eyes followed you secretly, even if I wasn’t starring you, but anyhow I was .I hided that in a very professional accord.

 I was shy to even approach you and talk like friends, even after being in same school and with a reasonable share of mutual friends; I couldn’t gather guts to convert our acquisition as acquaintance to the normal friends. Onset of that first day, my all the days on the trip revolved around your tiny memory. I had already started making a lot of scenarios in my mind by then. While eating, my eyes looked for you, they were curious to know your location, your company of friends and every tiniest of the details surrounded you.

Finally trip got over, but my mind wasn’t over you, it has never been able to, till date. You still hold the same place for me. Even after leaving school, settling to college,  getting in to a toxic relationship, and then letting myself out of it, and finally finishing college, chasing life, growing in to a matured human being. However, you and your memories haven’t left my brain and heart because that’s where you belong to.

Thus,  I kept  this secret  between  me and my bench  partner, also, I heard stories  about  you, that you were being proposed  by very stunning  girls at school  and  you sunned one of them  because  you weren’t  at all interested. That’s why I never felt my level approachable enough,  as I was very calm and docile, with easily countable companions.

  you were in a different  stream  and in a different  section ,still I could  afford  to see you through  the corner of my eyes during  reassess.  You won’t  believe  I had the soup  which I never liked just because  you were standing  somewhere  near and I had an ardent  desire  to see you from distance atleast. Not only  this, one of my friend suggested  me to go to your section  along with her in order  to start  a tangible  conversation  with you as friends. However,   I had no guts, to even start  a conversation,  I had a nagging  fear, what if you get to know from my tone that I like you, from my face which blushes every time it sees you. what if this thought  of yours resist  you to imagine  me even your friend. because it always becomes  difficult  to be friend with  someone  who has already  made it obvious  that they like us in the capacity  of more than friends

Your intelligence,  your choices,  your simplicity, your  smile,  I fell for every  thing , literally  every  thing. I wish I had more conversations with you at school. I wish I could have at least developed a great friendship with you.But on the  other  hand this is absolutely  advantageous  that I wasn’t  your friend,  had I been one, I must knew  about  your crush, someone  else  who you would be loving secretly, as I did to you.  In all those information I could  have  hurt myself  inside, because  in my imagination  you were far beyond than a comman mutual friend,You were extremely crucial ,not just an  acquaintance but the men of my dream. There in my dream you couldn’t afford the luxury of being with anyone else. I had been possessive already.

 I remember  I watched you,  secretly , when you  were  busy  playing  matches, I sneak peeked towards you in the assembly  from my position. for few days  when I didn’t  find  you there,  my heart beat jumped,  I wanted  to know where  have you been all those days,  got to know you went on a leave  for a function  at your home. even  after having  breakfast  fast I used  to see you from the window  whether  you came to have your breakfast  or not,  many times  I lose  track  because  even being inside  the hostel  we had to go through  that boring  counting  process  and we were  highly  restricted  not to spend  too much time on windows  as boys used to pass from that path to the mess

Even while  studying  I used to make  scenarios of you and me having  a great  time together,  I even saw you in my dreams,  one dream that I still  remember  vividly,  Where you bumped  into our class and sat on the seat next  to me,  watching me  with a deep romanticism in your eyes,  supporting  your face into your palm and elbow  resting  on the table. You were more enchanting  in my dreams than what I saw you physically, you always  carried  that efficiency,  you were an apple of many teachers  eyes and you  make them proud  till date,  so do you to me.

Thus, dear secret  crush keep up the good  work,  I still  watch you  from a distance that involves  peeping  through your social  media  accounts,  your Dp’s however I don’t  possess  that strong  conviction  and inclination  for you now,  maybe because  I fallen  in love with someone else,  even if that someone  else  is not in my life but,  both of you hold a place in the deepest  corner  of my heart,  and your places are irreplaceable.

When I was a kid my notion of beauty is to be fair, to be eclectic in your looks and photos, that’s why I always had his nagging fear and insecurity about my looks too, and almost everyone must have had these same thoughts sometime in the past because this is what we are shown in the TV, in movies , and in real life by the people and by the society but little do we care how that affects a person physiologically.
I know people who never got self-confidence to feel confident because they doubt their self-worth, they say “I am just another human existing with zero looks, nothing more than that”and this ideology disintegrates a person.

Here is the story of my two little baby siblings, my Gods blessings they were worn with the stunning features but dark skin as compared to other siblings, however, you won’t believe the kind of hurtful words they had to hear from the people in our close proximity, they include our uncle and Aunties a part of an extended family
“These two don’t match with your other kids, who you saw before they were worn” one of our relative chuckled
Followed by this, one day again one of our Aunties to my sister
“child, a dark boy can still adjust and manage to get a beautiful girl, but how about you, work on your skin, you look this much dark, I am worried if any boy would like you in the future” Guess what this women claims herself as our well-wisher, and this isn’t it, they both have heard it from a number of people , a number of times.
This blatant disapproval for their skin colour made an impact in their brains. I remember, few years back my sister saw a YouTube tutorial as to how one can become fair, it was something to do with the toothpaste and more additional ingredients on the face, being a child she had no idea about the duration and the areas of the face where it should not be applied, thus she end up making the paste and applied that on the complete face and kept that for a longer duration than advised and you can imagine what must have happened? The area exactly down to her eye balls felt the burning sensation, we all got to know this after she washed her face, and was screaming in the pain, that’s where I personally felt a complete failure within myself, the fact that being the family we couldn’t make them comfortable in their skin, we failed to assuage them that skin colour isn’t the only necessity to be beautiful rather ethics and morals are.

Being the eldest sister who always defended and gave a straight verbal punch to whatever relative said about their skin, I too felt the lowest at that time, there was a part of me who cried, because I could feel them, and their emotions.

Since then I made sure I will make them strong enough so they won’t be swayed away from what people say, That day I made her to see a movie where a black African women was a heroine, I made her to see few black models and their catalogue so that she gets to know her worth. She should have the confidence to wear her skin with proud. Since then I never missed the chance to give my bastes of the compliments whenever she dressed up,

Same with my baby brother, he too had stark insecurity about his skin colour, One day we went to visit an execution where in there was publicity about cosmetics and different types of soaps, so this little one came to me and genially whispered in my ear,
He said with a flick of shyness, “Ask them if they could provide us with a soap which makes a person fair from dark”
Listening to that, I was awestruck again, my baby siblings were going through this mental battle with themselves about their skin and I had no Idea, I tried making him comfortable on that spot and discussed the matter with our parents, we all three made sure that we restrict other people from using any slang regarding their skin colour, We made the environment within home so they feel proud of what they are, we always highlighted other best aspects of their personality.

Thus, I want my acquaintance and friends to make improvements in themselves too, there are numerous of ways which can be discovered to appreciate a person rather pointing out on something which is so apparent and they already know it.

At last ,I want to ask ,do we judge a falling star for falling , we make a wish rather, try doing that for a person once.

Hii, hope you are doing good with your life, hope you are keeping up well with  new people you must have met, after You ended the relationship with my brother.

I know we had no words in person ever before, You don’t know me by my voice, you must have seen my face because my brother would have shown you, because he never hide his relationship with me , and with all his near cousins because he was serious about you, about his love for you.

I know there were gaps between you for some time, I also know he ignored you for certain period and you were all anxious. You called him number of times, and for days, You wanted his good, I know, You also loved him with the same effinity as he do, I know
but he had developed misconceptions, he was considering you wrong on certain aspects. I knew that all,

However,all those days  he too was thinking about you, he was trying to understand you, so he discussed the matter with me , and Believe me I spoke in your favour, because I knew You loved him more then him ,even when all you were getting is blatent disrespect, rejections and heavy heart. To be true,he used some darogatory words for you, and trust me, I was extremely disunited with his pair of thaugts, I asked him to apologise to you, and give all the time you deserve.I asked him to stop ignoring you, I asked him to respect you, I put him in situations exactly you were in to understand and comprehand how it feels being you.

What I appreciate about you is, you never left things in those trying times. Resultantly, he ammended his ways because he loved you more then his ego. And you both were together again with the same affection.

You know How it all started, some of his friends who were not actually friends and more snakes wanted to hit on you secretly so they were interpreting and creating a bone of contention between you both.
They wanted to win you from him, he faught with some of them, he was insecure, he did not want to loose you. On the other side,you were talking to other boys may be in the capacities where it can be said apparently that you aren’t right in your ways too.
Even after all this, little does you know that he still has separate album of your photos in his laptop as well as in his phone, he never thought ending things,rather he choose to fight on certain mismatching believes, so you too improve your ways.

However what shattered him completely is your confession to him about your secret relationship with someone else for past 2 years, along with him as your partner, and that gave him a trauma for life.

U won’t even believe this, but one day he called me around 1 a.m in the night, he was all anixious, you both had a fight that day, he was not himself for the complete night, that pain of the arguments burnt his soul somewhere, and I wasn’t available because I was sleeping, I regret that I wasn’t, had I been there I would have made him feel at home, I must have assuaged him, But I couldn’t.

It’s going to be a year now, he still remembers you, just like the way he used to when you were together,their is this another girl who loves him,she wants him, she confessed her feelings to him but he doesn’t still feel the same effinity he had with you, he don’t even want that girl to be a part his life,
I don’t know when he will heal completely, when he will be with someone exactly the way he used to be with you, what if he never forget you completely, what if he leaves this love matters as not his cup of tea and never ever think to settle and consider himself a failure, what if his heart never relieve itself from the pain of your denial.

I don’t know how you forgot your bestest of the moments with him?, How you suddenly stopped loving him?, How you forgot that day when you faught with another girl for him?, because you were insecure, How you secretly talking to this another guy in your life without even thinking about him?
I don’t know on what basis you made your choices, I have no rights to judge you, but I have rights to Express what my brother is going through. I have rights to ask, is this you do with every relationship you have, with you family, siblings or friends that when things doesn’t seems on terms, instead of sorting them out you run to other people, you change people rather changing that point of view which led to misconceptions and misunderstanding?,Is this approach you follow?

After all that happened, What made you to seek mu brother again, when things weren’t on terms with your new boyfriend?, you were messaging him and calling him, when you left everything already then why it came in your mind to come back just to give him another disappointment? You wanted to come in the capacity of friends.
Do you still think that you can be friends with the same person with whom you used to make out somewhere in the past?
Or you were coming with the notion to keep him as a buffer stock, so when you are done with all your boyfriends, you can come back as it’s easy to make him an emotional fool just because he loves you?,Just because he will spare you again and you will get an another chance to use him as an option,

Don’t forget the fact that I am his sister and I know you enough to not let him drained in to you, If you can leave him as an option, I can make him understand that he shouldn’t allow you to come back as his choice

For the coming year we have  a lot to say and see. As we know 2020 have been a year of complete drastic circumstances and situations, the ones who never believed in being digital were spending time taking classes or giving classes online. The ones, who never liked the idea of being at one place, have spent reasonable months being at a single place. The ones who never wanted to do certain activities were pulled to do them. Also, the ones who were not internalizing themselves were bound to do so, as the gap and the space in once mind made them to do that.

Thus, 2020 has taught us patience, it has made all of us to reconcile and rejuvenate the better us, and developed an ideology to keep heading on, without excuse, because uncertainties are the only certain things this world has to offer.

We have numerous hopes from 2021, as 2020 has its dark and blurry sides too, we have faced the damaging sides, and we have lost some of our very near actors, learned people, even family members in some cases. No. of ladies have faced violence, several countries have gone through its impact. Rapes have again provoked the public, again a female feel the same void of not being safe, and secure. We eventually lost our trust from Media, information and the anchors are sold too.

we still fight for religion, we don’t put the humanity above all, we have still a long way to widen our perspectives, we still judge people from our level rather than understanding them from their stances, we still give priority to cast system, we limit our search from the very small group of similar cast when it’s come to marrying our children.

We give preference to society not to our own satisfaction and happiness and the happiness of our near and dear ones. When it comes to choosing wrong sides, and taking unappreciable decisions we manipulate the gray area of modern world and hence prove ourselves right saying its part of being modern, we try to show more then what we are, we believe more in status then being humble and self satiate, we don’t choose acceptance rather argumentations

Thus, to sum up let’s keep taking a sneak peek into ourselves and make an effort to develop our society around us, a better place to live in and use our resources as productively as we can. We should use our minds and thought processes to bring something from the resources which are still existing and stretch our limits to innovate something useful. I am sure we as a collective society has a lot of potential, if we keep working on improvements rather than judgements we can indeed bring the best in anyone and to everyone as a whole

Ask a mother who stays all night
To let you away, from grieves and plight

Ask the eldest sibling at home
Protects you, Inspires you, Gives tips for prome

Ask your father for carrying this effinity
so, you have intagged serenity

Ask that humble stranger you meet
Helps you selflessly with gracious greet

Ask that wife who has to thrive
Be it circumstances or her husband who drives

Ask that brother , who knows all intensions
so, worns sister to evaluate people with attention

Ask that girlfriend who piously loved
so, consumed manipulations her boyfriend bluffed

Ask that boyfriend, carries all the reverence
To support and keep choosing beloved, without severance

Ask that daughter who wants to sour high
whatever society says, she dreams to fly.

A head start
A bold decision
A new beginning
A certainity even after being uncertain
A conscious pull from the past
A pledge to be consistent
A promise to be a better human being
A dream to live for
A step towards acceptance
An affirmation to be more humble
An effort to polish your skills
A power to apologise for wrongs
A step towards healing
A kick start to pious intentions

If this isn’t it…
it’s a damage, a destructive force
A delusional state , a dark arena
The dumbest decision
In all, a complete disaster.